10 years that I publish drawings on the internet and... we need to talk, I think I have things to share more seriously.
Being an artist/creator, even if it remains just a simple hobby that we share for fun, there is not even a story of commission or anything on my side, well even that, it remains very complicated, we often take the head for insignificant things and that eats up creativity.
I had this impression of publishing my drawings as if I were a Youtuber, being too focused on the views, comments or likes that I will receive, while... there is nothing, everything is even calm, I should not worry about it.
I know that I have already spoken several times about this subject, but as I had already said, this mentality for a creator is purely toxic, you have to put yourself in my place.
When I grew up in my adolescence. YouTube is exploding, totally unknown people who are mostly losers become superstars overnight by making such varied content, which pleases millions of people.
And maybe it would work elsewhere than on YouTube and the proof is that it worked, you just have to see all the independent works that were originally just simple projects between friends or by a single person become a bomb on social networks, including YouTube in the front line, and that there are now millions who are fans of this kind of project overnight and that even today, it is still the case.
And in my head, I thought that my creations could explode overnight, even go from a simple internet meme, you never know, just keep drawing and make it seem like nothing, and that overnight.
Boom, people love VIC MK3 or whatever nickname I would have put, people would have loved my characters without knowing why, But just, having a level of fame, even a small level of fame, having achieved something that left its mark.
But there you go, that day has never happened for ten years and this mentality has become a bad habit and I know very well that I am not the only one who grew up like that and that there are other people who think more or less like me, well, I try not to think like that anymore, but you don't get rid of these bad habits by snapping your fingers.
It takes a lot of time, even years to get back to healthier habits, to be realistic about the situation and to tell yourself that in the end, if most things have been successful, it is just a huge stroke of luck, almost a miracle that it can happen.
And even, I have also seen that success and fame for some people has made them depressed, that these people would have preferred to stay in their corner and never have had success, because these people just wanted to create things for fun.
But when you now have millions of people waiting for what you're going to release, it would have to be a real masterpiece, better than the first time.
The crazy pressure that it must be, it's just impossible, but now, I know, I haven't lived like a star, but I understood that I would like not to be in this same crazy situation.
I was told something on discord that I shouldn't expect anything from others and that no one owes me anything in return, so... if I don't owe anything to others, then I think I should stop worrying about all this theater that makes me stay hours in front of my screen for nothing.
I'm not a star, I've always been a loser and in a way, I've always assumed it, and it helps me to react and evolve better in the right direction, for some time now, I've already been focusing on the essentials and being more active outside than being in front of my screen.
I've been doing it for a while now, but I didn't have the words to express it, I just hope that people will understand me and at the same time help other people who are much more lost than me.
The Internet, or social networks in particular, have sold us a dream that is not for everyone, this dream can make people toxic who basically lead a more or less normal life.
He could have had a job that was certainly boring, that didn't earn enough for their living, but at least they wouldn't be alone and would meet people in real life, and not in front of a screen that tells promises that no longer hold now.
For me, it's time to focus on more essential, more realistic things and I will continue to draw when I was bored, of course, but at least I won't do it for statistics, but for me.
It's a long way to go, a very long and boring evolution, but I will do it to prove that I am not a loser, but a man who will have finally evolved in the right direction with new goals in mind.
Don't be alone, don't be stupid, be yourself, do what you really like and maybe everything will be fine. Bi Bi to you, until next post.